Sorry girls. I think to myself, as I connect my cursor to the red X and close the browser window. You’re gonna have to entertain yourselves today. I have work to do.
I inhale deeply as if to swallow the satisfying sweetness of the moment.—I have work to do. I finally have work to do. My first three months as Marketing Assistant has consisted of answering the sporadic phone call, that is, if my boss doesn’t answer it first (Rich has never had an assistant before and reminds me often that he is still getting used to the idea.), “watching” bootlegged TV on my computer via a browser window that I keep hidden behind the Microsoft Outlook desktop app, talking to my friends on Gchat, and contemplating my next break from boredom, otherwise known as a snack.
I wonder if my friends are missing me today. Missing my stories. Usually, I am eager to log in and update the girls on my most recent episode of dating in New York. The more provocative or silly the tale, the more I enjoy telling it, impressing myself not only with the story, but also with the level of detail and wit with which my aspiring-writer fingers type it out. The dirtier the details, the more I am distracted from my lack-of-tasks at hand.
Though lately, the details have been more depressing than dirty.—I knew this was gonna happen. I catch myself thinking. He changed his mind. Like, on Wednesday everything was fine. We met each other on the Subway platform like most mornings, and we rode into the City together, talking about our weekend plans for the Fourth. And that was it! I haven’t seen or heard from him since. That was a week ago. So I guess we aren’t dating anymore. …What’s wrong with me?
If I were on Gchat, my girlfriends would respond with simpathy and support. Which would only encourage my unsettled mind to sink even deeper into self-doubt and disillusionment. Distracting, yes. But also detrimental, keeping me stuck on someone who clearly isn’t stuck on me.
I am not stuck, I remind myself, looking up from my desk and scanning the office scene. I work at Martha Stewart! I’ve got my foot firmly in the door. Now, it’s time to kick that door down. Transfer to the Editorial Department? Yes, please!
I move my mouse and double click to open PowerPoint on my computer. Upon Rich’s request, I have spent the week creating a presentation that illustrates how we could use marthastewart.com to sell more magazines. Rich calls this online subscription acquisition.
The phone on my desk rings and I raise my arm to answer. But Rich reaches his receiver first and takes the call without concern. I return to my presentation. There isn’t much time left before my meeting with Rich this afternoon.
*
Two hours later, Rich welcomes me into his office and motions for me to take a seat at the table situated in the center of his large corner office.
“Should I check my email?” he says, simultaneously doing just that. He sees my message, opens the file, and turns his laptop to face down the middle of the table. Then he looks at me, and I take my que to begin.
“So, here’s what I came up with,” I say, my voice shaking, but only a little. Rich keeps his eyes locked on the screen, so I continue. “Like you asked, I looked at one competitor from each of Martha’s categories—Oprah, Real Simple, Bon Appetit, Domino, Redbook and Country Living.”
“We should add a wedding title. InStyle,” he says, matter-of-factly.
“Right. Ok,” I say. I am disappointed because I should have thought of that, but what’s done is done, so I go on. “I went to each of their websites and took screenshots. Then put a red circle around everywhere they mention subscriptions.”
I look up from the slide and our eyes meet. “It’s interesting,” I say, “most of the brands offer a way to subscribe to their magazines through the website. But some brands are also offering subscriptions to a digital magazine, an online version that includes extra features like videos and links to more content. The digital subscriptions are generally priced lower than the printed version. Which makes sense because you don’t have to pay for digital magazines to be printed.”
Rich asks me to slow down and to click back through the competitive deck. A few minutes pass as Rich examines my work. Then, he reaches over to his desk and grabs the latest issue, Martha Stewart Living June 2008. As he does this, I can’t help but smile. Last month, my name premiered on the masthead. Charlotte King, Marketing Assistant. When the issue hit newsstands, I felt like a celebrity, or better—someone who was somebody in the magazine industry. I told everyone I knew about my vocational victory. Most people responded by asking, What’s a masthead? Which to me, only made the honor more exclusive.
I don’t interrupt Rich when he reaches for the magazine that features my name in print. I’ve already thanked Rich profusely for the honor. With the magazine in hand, he proceeds to flip through the pages until he finds what he is looking for. It’s one of those perforated cards, you know, the ones that you use to spit your gum into when you’re tired of chewing.
“As you know,” Rich says, “in Consumer Marketing, we are in charge of subscription acquisition, new people subscribing to Martha’s magazines. Believe it or not, ninety percent of our subscriptions are earned through these,” he says, holding up the gum-receptacle. “This insert card offers a six-issue subscription for $12. And this one,” he says, flipping through a few more pages, “is offering twelve issues at 50% off for $24.”
“Each card has a unique index code,” Rich continues, now pointing to a tiny eight-character code printed in the bottom left corner of the card. “People fill these out and mail them into our fulfillment center. Then we track the results to find out which offer acquired more subscriptions. We call this A/B testing—You know, apples to apples, because it’s the same price. Anyway, being able to subscribe online would disrupt this entire business model.” He takes a breath and says, “This is great, Charlotte. Keep going.”
“Umm. Ok,” I begin again, “So you can see that most of these sites have a permanent ad here, above the main menu, next to a search bar, or here, along the left side of the page. When you click on one of these ads, it takes you to this screen.” My next slide features a landing page with text fields to collect the necessary information: name, email, credit card. “A shipping address is only needed for printed editions. Digital subscriptions are delivered through a link sent to the email address provided.”
I feel like I am talking too much, so I give Rich a minute to lean in and review the entire online form. “‘’Go paperless’ option,” he says to himself, and scribbles a note onto his yellow legal pad. Then he looks back at me and says, “After people subscribe, we have to bill them. Billing and Renewals is a huge component of what we do here in Consumer Marketing. But let’s not get too into that right now. What else do you have to show me?”
“Ok.” I say, relieved because Billing and Renewals is extremely boring and not at all creative. “Ummm…So then I started thinking, What could we do? You know, on the Martha website.”
Rich smiles like he just won a bet with himself. “Good! I am curious to hear your ideas.”
I click to the next slide displaying a screenshot of the marthastwart.com homepage. “I marked in red all the places we could put something about subscribing online.” Again, Rich leans forward to examine the slide.
“This is really great work, Charlotte.”
“Thank y—”
The phone rings. He twists at his waste to face his desk and reaches his neck back to view the caller ID.
“Oh, it’s Judy,” he says, smiling at the thought of his wife, and swings his arm back to pick up the phone. Before bringing it to his ear he says, “Thank you, Charlotte. Great work. Lots to think about. I’m going to look this over and I’ll let you know what’s next.”
“Do you want me to add a slide for InStyle Weddings?” I say quickly, resenting my failure to do so in the first place.
“No, I don’t think that’s necessary. Thanks for asking.”
He waits for me to nod in agreement before speaking into the phone, “Hey!…Haha, the boys did what?”
I return to my desk feeling accomplished. A moment later, Rich comes out of his office with his coat and briefcase in hand.
“I’m going to catch the 5:15 train home,” he says. “Feel free to head out too. Remember, I’ll be out all day tomorrow for the Executive quarterly meeting. Your presentation was perfect. Exactly on point for what we’ll be discussing. They are redesigning marthastewart.com and I want subscription acquisition to be a big consideration.”
I thank him again and watch him leave. Then, I switch off my computer and pack up my things.
The next day is Friday. My only project now complete, I sit restless at my desk. The hours pass slowly. I am back on Gchat, but there is nothing left to say.
